In a recent post, Storyteller asked if everyone had made their "bucket list." You've heard of the bucket list, right? It's a list of things that you want to do before you kick the bucket. The name of the list (though not the idea) comes from yet another movie that I haven't seen.
The answer is no, I have not made a bucket list. I have, however, made a fuck it list. This is my list of things that I have come to accept will not occur before I drop dead. I share it, here, with you.
Mama Zen's Fuck It List
- Jon Bon Jovi and Bruce Springsteen will never engage in a vicious bar fight for my affections, with the winner pledging his undying love.
- My "little black dress" will never be little again. The phrase "two pigs fighting under a blanket" comes to mind.
- I will never win the lottery. I will always be one number off.
- Flowers placed in my care will never flourish. Even the arrangements placed on my casket will wilt.
- I will never rest in peace until I am truly resting in peace, if you know what I mean.
- I will never have a full tank of gas when I'm in a hurry.
- I will never purchase just the right present.
- No matter how many times she corrects me, I will never stop calling my daughter "baby."
- I will never prepare a meal that does not provide bitch-fodder for someone.
- I will never be finished. Ever.
So, what's on your fuck it list?
17 comments:
Oh! I am going to have to brainstorm for this one! Great post! I will post something in a bit! :)
I'm going to make one too! Today might have to be a double "post-it" day.
A Fuck it list is much more realistic for me... but it would be too damn long to list it all out.
I love it!! I'm going to start on mine now!!
I'm laughing so hard I can barely type! I just discovered the link you left on my Sunday post ...(thanks for the linky-love)... and clicked to see who had left it. I've not seen this film either but my friends talk about it all the time. Your 'take' on the list makes much more sense to me ... and I'll give some thought to creating one of my own to share ...(or not). LOL
Hope you're having a Marvelous Monday!
Hugs and blessings,
I leave this to you: truly, brilliantly funny.
You totally crack me up!
I like this one. So much more realistic :)
Love it! Currently on my fuck it list, is the pile of dishes sitting in the sink!
At this very moment everything is on my fuck it list...but I've had a craptastic 6 hours, so I'll have to come up with a better, more detailed list.
So, based on your list, can I assume you are from New Jersey?
Interesting list! I haven't created one yet, but I have a feeling it will be much longer than what I know I can do.
So funny. Gah my list would be pretty long I think. I'll have to do one of these too.
oh girl.....what a list. you made me giggle. Love your first one. oh and I am totally offensive with the "baby" comments at my house too. sigh...
oh i freaking love you! you are so funny. gonna work on my list...
I think putting things on this list and out of my head gets rid of more stress than that glass of wine I crave at night.
Cute post. I think I could use a daily list like this instead of a "to - do list!"
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